Struggling with Meaninglessness

searching meaning in meaninglessness


with 3 comments

For the past 2-3 months, i had several unique dreaming experiences. I will share 2 of them with you.

1.I dreamt of falling in love with an unknown girl, yes, literally in my dreams. I dreamt that i met my perfect girl, stunningly cute and with a bubbly personality, and i immediately fell in love with her in the first sight. While we were having some interesting conversations, suddenly poof, i woke up and came back to the real world where she doesn’t exist.

So imagine my feelings the moment i woke up from my dream. I can tell you the feeling was really sour. I felt really awful. It was like, suddenly the love of my life has vanished to nowhere. Gone. The first few minutes after waking up was a pretty traumatic experience because the confusion was really crazy. In reality, this girl do not exist, yet the lingering feeling is real. And she is gone. But she is not real. What the heck, i fell in love with my dreams?

Just like a typical dream, as minutes go by, more and more memories attached with our dreams will slowly go off. And after 15-20 minutes ,it finally went off to the point even my emotions attached was also gone. Suddenly, i do not love my dream anymore. And i was like, hey, what’s going on here?

But thinking about it, isn’t this is what happening in our real life? When we are in our teenage years, we fall in love with someone good looking and as we grow up to adulthood, we most likely will change our mind and fall in love with another person who seem to suit our taste better. I always believe the emotion of love is just something temporal. (But respect is eternal)

Therefore, I’m basically fooled by my emotions even in my dreams…. and my subconscious mind too. It really shows the incompleteness of how human brain is wired.

2. Lately, i have been dreaming many situations where i always asked myself Why-What- How-Who-When-Which sort of questions on random things. But each time, i will always give myself an incomplete answer.

Let me share with you one of the dreams I partially remember.

I dreamt that I was walking under the rain on a roadside while holding an umbrella (in real life, I love walking under the rain for some weird reasons minus the thunder and lightning). While I was strolling around, I contemplated the rain and connects it with God’s existence (which I have forgot what the thoughts were). The next thing, I saw there were many dead big fishes lying on the grass. I asked myself – why are they all dead ? And I reasoned myself, the rain must be so heavy just now the whole area was flooded. Now that the water has subsided, the fish was stuck on the land and died on the grass. Then I asked myself again – if so where does these fishes come from? And i figured it out again – they must come from the drain.

This dream was so interesting that the moment i woke up, i spent a few good minutes  contemplating about my dream. The most important issue here is- Why did i gave the answer that the fishes came from the drain? That’s the most intriguing part.

You see, dreams are not totally random. Just like what Carl Jung and Sigmund Freud believed, there’s a system of how dreams work but so far, we have yet to connect the dots. So, we are still not 100% sure how dreams work.

I could always feel that i was thinking hard in my dreams. So there are two issues here:

  1. In reality, it is impossible for wild big fishes to exist in a suburb area. Hence, to see big fishes in my dreams on a roadside is not meaningful. In other words, this dream of mine is absurd. Therefore, why does my mind do not tell me that this is an absurd dream while i was sleeping, but once i woke up, i immediately know that this dream was absurd?
  2. It seems as though i just randomly pluck the closest answer i could find within the boundary of my dreams when i asked myself a meaningless question which have no answer. I figured the process is something like this – since drain contains water and have close resemblance to river, therefore the fishes come from the drain.

My hypothesis is that there are some parts of our brain which are not fully connected while we are sleeping. And this part of our brain would have something to do with logic. That’s why the details of our dreams are often incomplete and absurd at times.

I do not know whether other people have such unique dreaming experience, but i think most people will just take dreams with a pinch of salt. But i think it is extremely interesting to ponder on such interesting phenomenon. What is exactly dreams?


Written by elan85

April 12, 2008 at 4:41 am

Posted in Psychology

3 Responses

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  1. I had something very similar happen to me just last night. I met this girl(I am Bisexual) who was so familiar to me. I felt an immediate in love feeling with her and we were together and she told me how we were soul mates. I knew I was dreaming and could sense that I was waking up soon and tried terribly to stay sleeping. I awoke and was so sad, I went right back to sleep and tried to find her in my dreams. I did and she said I have found you again. Her hair was in a bun but it was her face. I was so happy, and fulfilled. I knew once again I was only dreaming and I kept telling her that I didn’t want the dream to end. I tried so hard to stay asleep, once again I woke up. This went on with her all night. The last time when I was about to wake up I began crying begging to never wake up again. I was full of grief. I woke up to find myself sobbing. This lasted about 20 minutes. I was just so heart broken. I feel so weirded out about it. I really feel that this is someone that found me in my dreams from a past experience. I believe in reincarnation. I know this sounds profound but this person seemed very real to me. I am trying to find info on it. Thanks for your time

    Kim Cathcart

    April 12, 2008 at 9:42 pm

  2. Dear Kim,

    That’s quite a touching story here. I’m not really optimistic about reincarnation though because if you read my blog posts here, you will get the idea that i’m a pretty secular person. I don’t really know how to help you but i hope i could do my bits by sharing with you a story here…

    Carl Jung, a psychologist and a psychiatrist had consulted a seventeen years old girl who was thought to have hysteria problems. After several rounds diagnosis, he asked the girl to share with him her dreams that she had dream off in the past few days. She said that there were two very significant dreams –

    1. She dreamt that her mother hanged herself in the house.
    2. She dreamt that a horse ran around her house, destroying doors and walls, and finally jumped out of the window and mangled lifelessly on the floor.

    Carl Jung interpreted the dreams as followed:
    1. Mother represents her inner mind. Therefore, the girl’s subconscious mind and inner mind are being destroyed.
    2. Horse represents her animal life, which means movements and vitality. To see a dying horse means her vitality is dying.
    3. House represents herself. She dreamt that the horse destroyed her house – that means, her vitality has destroyed her life.

    Hence, Carl Jung believed the girl has some organic disease problems rather than psychological problems (hysteria). Later on, the prognosis was confirmed that she has the first stage of progressive muscular atrophy, a rare disease which will affect our muscles.

    So you see, dream actually works in a way where our subconscious mind is trying to communicate with us and we have to interpret it via symbolically. Carl Jung said: “That is the dream’s message to the conscious mind of the dreamer and to anybody who has ears to hear.” You might want to read more on Carl Jung’s works on dream as he loves interpreting dreams from spiritual point of view (especially Eastern spiritualism). Hopefully i helped ;).

    Ronn Yeo

    April 13, 2008 at 1:10 am

  3. Interesting. I too fell in love with someone who I don’t know in my dream this afternoon and kept wondering who she was but hours passed I forgot her face and lost the emotion that I had, any interpretations?


    April 22, 2013 at 11:45 pm

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